Tonight he said, “I don’t know if you realize how rare you are.”
I stared at him.
“Do you?”
I told him what a strange thing that is to be asked. “You’re amazing, did you know?” Of course I know. We all are, in our own way. But do I know how you see me? Do I know which of my traits you’ve focused in on, things I’m probably aware exist but rarely even think about anymore? Do I walk around my life each second thinking, “Yes, I certainly am God’s gift to all of creation?” I don’t. Unless you flat out tell me, like you’re doing right now, I have no idea what kind of light fills your eyes when you look at me.
At some point, I don’t remember when, I began making an effort to stop complaining. It wasn’t easy. I still do it now and then. But I figured, half the time I’m not as miserable as I sound, and the other half I’m actually convincing myself I’m as miserable as I sound. It added up to a lot of misery.
Why? I could just be happy, couldn’t I?
I wasn’t sure, but in an amount of time measurable in years (in my estimation) later, I found myself sitting in an orange, winged armchair, drinking coffee, and looking straight back at this beautiful, emotional, honest man saying, “I’ve been alive for 28 years and do you know how many women like you I’ve known? Not enough.”
And I realized that, at some point, I made the right decision.
And part of that decision involved surrounding myself with the right people. Not everyone can be skittles and unicorns all day every day, and I’m not either. But knowing who really has the kind of outlook on life to just throw the “glass half full” mindset out the window and instead pop by the table unasked to give you the refill and a brand new slice of lemon? Make sure those are the people you spend your time with. That’s what really matters. Not letting the other people tear you down, and even doing your best to maintain your sunny attitude, hoping to be some sort of example or inspiration to those who just aren’t there yet? That’s what really matters.
I don’t care who you are. Life isn’t about how much money you have, how many people know who you are, how many popularity contests you’ve won or how many people you boss around forty hours a week. It’s about loud music on the open road, chocolate chip cookies, morning walks, dusty family farms, holding hands, movies and couches and glasses of wine and fireplaces, telling great stories, and laughing a lot. It’s about living life and enjoying it, and you’re only going to enjoy it if you start looking for the things and the people worth enjoying.
That’s why I love this community. Right here. It’s about love up in here. All about love. And you’re on board with me. And that’s why I keep you around.
Do I realize how rare I am?
No.
I don’t think I’m terribly rare. But maybe I have a skewed sense of the world around me, because I’ve found all of you. But maybe he just hasn’t been looking in the right places.
Maybe it’s both.
I’m an optimist. I hope. I believe. I dream.
But I’m not the only one.
I love the line “throw the ‘glass half full’ mindset out the window and instead pop by the table unasked to give you the refill and a brand new slice of lemon”.
Some people are so worried about who they are that they forget about what they are doing; doing is the important thing.
One more thing; I feel confident in saying it even though I don’t know you well: you ARE the only one. In some small or large way you are different from every single person on earth. Have fun with that.
do you know how rare you are?
my dear, one of these days you will come to the realization that yes, you are VERY rare. you are a gem. there AREN’T that many people out there like you. like me. like the other people we hang out with. we are a rare, beautiful breed that not enough people get to meet and spend part of their lives with. this is definitely a new realization for me, and i kinda like it.
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