The Back Burner

Forget the back burner.  My musical ambitions are in the freezer.

The reasons are compound and varied, but the fact of the matter is that I haven’t done anything productive for myself as a musician since July, and even that was just sitting down to write a song.

My BFFL (Best Friend From Life) moved in with us a month or so ago.  She moved from our hometown with her camera and a dream, much like I did three years ago with my piano and notebook.  But a month in, and I feel like she’s already doing bigger things for herself than I ever have.

I didn’t want to ruin what I loved with business, because business is something I have always despised.  I also didn’t want to find myself using people for what they could offer me in terms of business rather than in terms of friendship, scared of being anything but genuine, myself.  So I never really dove in.

But it turns out I’ve ruined what I loved anyway.  I’ve wrapped myself up in a job I don’t particularly care for in a house that keeps me anything but secluded and able to concentrate, with other hobbies and interests and obligations that take up too much of my time.

I was at a used media store the other day… books, video games, movies…

I found two books full of country music from the 90s and I picked them up.  I asked as I walked away with them, “Is this just a waste of money?”

No, because I’ve been playing my piano almost nightly for the first time since probably June.

Little things and baby steps.  Let’s take this dream out of the freezer and move it to the back burner, at very least. Yes?

 

About Courtney

Singer. Songwriter. Kitchen Concoctor. Sewing-machiner. Home-maker-prettier. New wifey. Montanan by birth and at heart. In love with Nashville forever.
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2 Responses to The Back Burner

  1. cari says:

    I always find it amazing when life gets in the way of what we really want to do. Like, real life and daily living. We can get so wrapped up in doing from moment to moment and day to day that we forget why we ended up where we are today. I think it’s important to remember those things and to take those baby steps. You never know when a baby step will turn into a gargantuan leap and get you right where you always wanted to go.

  2. Erin says:

    You always seem to hit the nail on the head, Courtney, and this post is no different. I’m feeling the back burner thing here, too, and definitely felt like I was in the same position as you when I was in Nashville… subsequently working at the same place. ;) Take those baby steps, and I have no doubt you’ll find yourself where you need to be. I know I’ve been doing the same, and I am amazed at the things that are happening.

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